It Takes Two


A relationship is a two-way street.  One person shouldn’t be expected to make the full commute as the other person just sits and waits.  Instead, there has to be a compromise.  There has to be a green light somewhere.  In a relationship (or even a prospective one at that), you have to meet each other half way.  Generally, there are a few rules that each prospective partner should follow.  These are rules that are meant to foster a proper relationship that will actually last and not one that is headed for a tragic collision.

1. Communicate Clearly.

Sending mixed signals is your one way ticket to the friend zone, so show your interest in the most  direct way possible.  Men, don’t talk about the hot chick next door as you have your arm around your crush’s waste.  That’s just not cool.  And ladies, don’t sing along to the man bashing song that plays at the next party.  It’s the perfect male repellant.  The point is be completely clear and honest about what you want.  Don’t talk in lexicon and don’t beat around the bush.  Even if you’re at her house singing Bruno Mars’ Marry You, you’re doing something wrong when you’re pointing to the imaginary girl in front of you and not the real one next to you.  Sometimes the classic and impossible to misunderstand I like you is the best way to go.

2. Cooperate.

One person cannot carry an entire relationship and we all have to put in some effort.  Ladies, if you see your guy desperately trying to be romantic and it’s not working out perfectly have a little sympathy and help him out.  At least he’s making an effort.  Plus, you have to keep in mind that most men need a lot of help when it comes to deciphering what women want.  Admit it, we can be difficult when we want to be.  So when he invites you out to a party or out bowling, accept the hint and just go with him.  What matters is that he is extending an invitation out to you.  If you don’t cooperate with him, he’ll eventually get over your I’m too busy for you attitude and move on to the next one.  And the same goes for men.  If a girl is cold or if she wants to dance, please realize that she is leaving the door wide open for you to step in.  If you don’t get it, expect her to direct her attention to her girlfriends or even another guy.

3. Take Initiative.

If you notice that your crush is constantly eyeing you and talking to you about things that really don’t matter, then it’s time for you to grow a pair and make the next move.  They’re obviously interested in you, so why don’t you ask them out to a movie or something?  Why don’t you call them to just see how they’re doing?  I mean, isn’t that why you have their number anyways?  I’ve said this many times on my blog before… you have to work for what you want.  Unfortunately, a relationship isn’t going to just fall in your lap.  If you’re crush is stuck in limbo and doesn’t have the courage to push it a little further, then it’s up to you to do so.  Because if neither of you do it, then nothing is ever going to happen.

Like I said before, it’s a two-way street.  If you don’t know where either of you stand, you’re headed straight for a crash.  If your crush is doing all of the work and you’re not cooperating, then they will move on.  If neither of you are doing anything, then you can’t move any closer.  But then again, if you’re doing everything you can and it’s not working out, then just let it go.  Either way, everyone has to make an effort if they want that great relationship.


About Tatiana Figueroa Ramirez

Born in Puerto Rico and raised in the mainland United States, I graduated with a B.A. in English Literature from the University of Maryland, Baltimore County (UMBC) and am a 2016 VONA Voices Alumna. I currently perform spoken-word in the greater Washington D.C. area and have previously performed in Philadelphia, Miami, and the Dominican Republic. Most recently, I have been published in Public Pool, Spillwords, and The Acentos Review, and Here Comes Everyone: East & West Issue.

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