Thirteen from 433 Eros

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The New York poet Frankie Reese has quickly become a figure of inspiration for me since the first season of MTV’s Washington Heights premiered in January and, although the season finale of the show is in the past, Frankie remains as an individual I look up to.  On the show, she proved herself to be classy, selfless, and loving.  With those traits also came the undeniably charming factors of being real and spunky, but I mostly admire Frankie for her talent in poetry.  Performing poetry is something that I would like to do some day and I applaud how effortlessly Frankie does it.  I also can’t help but appreciate the actual content of her work, which, in my opinion, is pretty beast, so I couldn’t resist and I bought her audiobook 433 Eros.  I listened to it as soon as I got it and I have no regrets.  If you enjoy poetry, I highly recommend Frankie’s work.  In case you have no idea of what Frankie’s about, take a look at her poem “Thirteen” from 433 Eros.  Enjoy!

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Thirteen by Frankie Reese

I let go,
and it felt so damn good to lose control
to no longer be trapped in your cryptic hold
I let go
relinquished the fire in my heart, that popped and sparked for you
It felt nothing like defeat
I found the real me
I let go

Of a love that consumed me
devoured me from the inside out
I had my doubts
but this is the liberation that I was looking for
I let go
and my heart is free

I didn’t know giving up on love could feel this damn good
I didn’t know that throwing in the towel would get me here
on this crossroads of me and I
Where I’ve I regained my pride
regurgitated, forced that shit back up and put all the bullshit aside
and found who I really was
a fighter, who despite of
the fucked up situation
refused to lose concentration
didn’t succumb
even though her battles couldnt be won
this bitch knew she’d win the war because she knew what she was fighting for

I found the mold of a woman who refused to take second best
or give her pride to a man who’d hide behind his member
who tried to dismember her heart
chamber by chamber
valve by valve
ventricle by ventricle
put me through a lifetime full
of every emotion you could possibly imagine
in the span of thirteen long dogged months
and its funny it took thirteen, yes lucky number thirteen
months to rid you from my soul
because the number represents the day you became another woman’s punishment
and were no longer Gods burden

Lucky number fucking thirteen
God let go,
and so do I
of the lack of man who couldn’t deal with the Real Me
who couldn’t bear that he’d have to kick His Ways
because he’d come across The Real Thing

A lucky little creature
who was lucky enough to be loved by me
lucky enough to be etched into the histories
of Love Lost and Love Found by me,
Found by me

Thirteen was someone who couldn’t see the simple beauty
in a woman who knows who she is
The Lack of Man who feared the power of a woman
I let go

I let go of the dream
that I could change someone, but see
through letting you go I’ve realized
that I could never change a person who hides behind lies
Too blinded by lust to realize that it’s God knocking on their door

That’s right, I
I and I, Jah, Frankie, Me
am equal to the one who forsake you
I came her to take you back
to rid you of your demons
for you I gave up my pipe dreams of love
But I and I
In all my feminine divinity
know that you are not Lucky,
Unlucky number thirteen
you’re a curse
upon this earth
for the girls who dont know their self worth
who dont have enough understanding to put themselves first
who dont know arithmetic in dancing with the Devil
You’re karma, here to disarm and harmnand harden hearts
but I and I
don’t possess one of these faulty forms of sustenance
that often find us in duress
that too often make us feel second best

On the crossroads of me and I
I and I multiplied
and I found the I in I
and became I and I
something divine
ever present for all time

On the crossroads
I’ve realized that I could never change someone who doesn’t know who they are
I let go, of an unlucky number thirteen
I let go and got so far, the crossroads became my home

I and I, saw that thirteen could only make two, three or four
and I and I represents so much more
I and I saw the rationality in numbers
and lets face it, love is never rational
and I and I is Love

and true
True Number may be infinite
but they represent infinities in simplicity
and I’d much rather represent them in
presidencies, so I will set a precedent for thee
and I will show you what I and I means

I and I am ever-present
in this universe, in you and them
in your family and friends
I said I’d be here until the end
and here I stand
I and I
in all my glory
to rid myself of the lucky, Unlucky number thirteen
I and I , I let go thirteen
(I-a-n-d-I-I-l-e-t-g-o-1-3)
I’m even present in you, that’s present in me
I’m even present in the you that’s present in the me

I will haunt you
not with my hate, but with my love
Unlucky Lucky, Lucky Unlucky number thirteen

— Frankie Reese, November 2011.

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